HEALING FROM ABUSE > Invisible Me

Invisible me

I wish I could paint,
but I can’t.
Not yet.
My hands...
I have to carry a bag
full of stones.
I carry it upon my back.
 
I wish I could dance
as I did before,
but I can’t.
Someone is watching me.
And I hear the voice,
full of belittlement,
“You look like an idiot.”
 
I bow down as the bag of stones feels heavier.
 
I wish I could sing
at the top of my lungs,
but I can’t.
My throat is too stiff
from holding in the tears.
 
I wish I could run
on meadows that I loved.
I wish I could climb
my favorite hills.
I wish I could simply...
I wish I could feel.
I wish I could cry.
I wish I could laugh,
but I can’t.
 
In March I died.
 
Invisible me…
I still walk around.
Unnoticed, unheard.
Some say,
“I think she is gone.”
Yet, sometimes I hear
people walking by.
They say, “Look, look over there.
What a big bag of stones!”


LILIANA KOHANN
©ArtPeace Publishing 2000

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