I wonder why so many people are scared of EMOTIONS? I can't count the times when I was put down for simply feeling, especially when I could't hide tears. Most of the time we have to hide our tears, and not go too crazy with our laughter. Yet, it is so wonderful when you meet somebody that allows you to feel, and to express what you feel. I hope this websites to be a little bit like that. A friend that openly shares, and a friend that truly listens.
I used to be very scared of publishing my poems. I still am, in a way. I thought my language is too simple, some of my expressions may be awkward, people will not like them, they'll make fun out of me... English is actually my third language. I don't even know why I write in English. But the thing is I don't really ever sit down to write a poem. I sit down to write in my journal, and once in a while my creativity takes over, I see some (usually funny) characters in my imagination and they "speak" to me in a poetical language. I keep writing what I hear, then take these writings out of my journal and leave them as separate poems. I actually hired a therapist to help me figure out why I was so scared to step to the light, to put my poems and songs out. He made some excellent points, I learned a lot, yet still didn't go forward. I actually had an amazing person (Oprah Winfrey) ask me: "Send those poems to me, and you send them fast!" I didn't do it. The fear was so big, almost as if a spell was placed over me. It is my own poem that actually helped me move forward:
...Maybe I sense death,
or maybe I fear
that once fear is gone
I would have to appear.