POEMS ABOUT COMPASSION > With Every Compassionate Tear
WITH EVERY COMPASSIONATE TEAR
With every compassionate tear
fallen down, a little flower grows.
With every tear that’s been
kept inside, a flower loses its soul.
With every smile on someone’s face,
a little flower lives.
With
every word
unkindly
spoken,
a flower loses a leaf.
With
every gift
and sign
of support,
a flower wants to rise.
With
lack of
love
or faith
in one,
a flower
surely
dies.
As you’re the gardener on this earth,
and you reap what you sow,
remember on your
path of life:
FLOWERS WERE MEANT TO GROW.
fallen down, a little flower grows.
With every tear that’s been
kept inside, a flower loses its soul.
With every smile on someone’s face,
a little flower lives.
With
every word
unkindly
spoken,
a flower loses a leaf.
With
every gift
and sign
of support,
a flower wants to rise.
With
lack of
love
or faith
in one,
a flower
surely
dies.
As you’re the gardener on this earth,
and you reap what you sow,
remember on your
path of life:
FLOWERS WERE MEANT TO GROW.
LILIANA KOHANN ©Artpeace Publishing 2000
I wrote this poem when I was a guest on Oprah Winfrey show. The story and reflection prompts are below. These prompts aim to encourage deep reflection on the themes of emotional resilience, compassion, personal growth, and the impact of one's actions on oneself and others. To read, click on the rectangles below.
Summary
The poem "With Every Compassionate Tear" uses the metaphor of flowers to illustrate the impact of emotions and actions on the human spirit. It highlights how compassionate tears and kindness promote growth and vitality, while suppressed emotions and unkind words cause harm and deterioration. Acts of support encourage the spirit to thrive, whereas neglect and lack of faith lead to its decline. The poem emphasizes personal responsibility, reminding readers that they are the gardeners of their own and others' well-being, and that nurturing actions are essential for flourishing.
How this poem & song came to life
Before I tell you how this song came to life, I'd like to share something I often do. Ever since I was a young child, I've been very creative and had a strong imagination. This made my playtime much more fun and helped me endure hard times. Even today, I use my imagination as a tool to grow, to understand and master myself, and to heal. One of the things I do is ask myself: If my life now were a painting, what would it look like? Then I close my eyes and enter a meditative state. Soon, the painting becomes very clear. What amazes me is that, without much thought, the painting reveals things I wasn't even aware of. It illuminates my inner world.
In the year 2000, I looked at that painting, and it was very different from the one a year before. It was fogged up, devoid of color, and on the right side, there was a little, tilted, brownish, almost dried flower. It seemed as though the flower was disappearing, slowly moving out of the canvas.
It was also in the year 2000 that I received an unexpected call. One of Oprah Winfrey's producers called me at work and asked me to participate in an upcoming show called "The Courage to Be a Single Mother." This was frightening because I was hiding the fact that I had just gotten divorced. My ex-husband was still living in my house. Even my own parents didn't know. I was shielding the world from my pain. Despite appearing happy and strong for others, especially for my three little boys, the dying flower on my canvas signaled that something needed to change.
Now, back to the creation of my poem "With Every Compassionate Tear." I wrote these words in my journal (which I later rewrote as a poem and a song) when I was a guest on the Oprah Winfrey show. I agreed to appear on the show, hoping to give strength to other women and mothers. Yet, when I arrived, I couldn't be my usual strong self. On the contrary, I fell apart. My pain became too poignant, too overwhelming. I became so weak, unable to hold back the tears. I couldn't speak. I was terrified of the pain inside and didn't want to be there. I felt embarrassed and wanted to run away, to disappear. I even started making plans to leave.
At that moment, something extraordinary happened. Totally unexpectedly, Oprah grabbed my hand and held it tightly. She continued talking to the other guests while holding my hand. There are only a few times in my life that someone has held my hand so firmly. I began to feel her strength entering my body. I looked at the audience and was overwhelmed by the compassion in their eyes. Between Oprah holding my hand and the loving compassion from the audience, something began to shift inside me. I started to feel my strength returning. It was as if someone suddenly gave me permission to feel my pain, to be weak. I had to accept that I wouldn’t be a "giver" at that moment, that I might look pathetic because once I started crying, I knew I wouldn’t be able to stop, and I wouldn't be able to speak clearly (especially terrifying with English being my third language). Yet, simultaneously, I started feeling a new strength within me. The compassion from Oprah and the audience lifted me up.
Suddenly, my mental canvas appeared before me. I saw little drops of compassionate tears falling on the little flower, and it slowly started lifting itself up. As my own tears rolled down my face—tears that were compassionate toward me and for all the other single mothers and children of abusive parents—and as I felt immense gratitude for Oprah and all the women there, the words kept flowing in my head. Later, I grabbed a pen and started writing: "With every compassionate tear falling down, a little flower grows..." I also heard beautiful music in my head. Eventually, I combined the words from my journal and the music, and you can hear it below.
In the year 2000, I looked at that painting, and it was very different from the one a year before. It was fogged up, devoid of color, and on the right side, there was a little, tilted, brownish, almost dried flower. It seemed as though the flower was disappearing, slowly moving out of the canvas.
It was also in the year 2000 that I received an unexpected call. One of Oprah Winfrey's producers called me at work and asked me to participate in an upcoming show called "The Courage to Be a Single Mother." This was frightening because I was hiding the fact that I had just gotten divorced. My ex-husband was still living in my house. Even my own parents didn't know. I was shielding the world from my pain. Despite appearing happy and strong for others, especially for my three little boys, the dying flower on my canvas signaled that something needed to change.
Now, back to the creation of my poem "With Every Compassionate Tear." I wrote these words in my journal (which I later rewrote as a poem and a song) when I was a guest on the Oprah Winfrey show. I agreed to appear on the show, hoping to give strength to other women and mothers. Yet, when I arrived, I couldn't be my usual strong self. On the contrary, I fell apart. My pain became too poignant, too overwhelming. I became so weak, unable to hold back the tears. I couldn't speak. I was terrified of the pain inside and didn't want to be there. I felt embarrassed and wanted to run away, to disappear. I even started making plans to leave.
At that moment, something extraordinary happened. Totally unexpectedly, Oprah grabbed my hand and held it tightly. She continued talking to the other guests while holding my hand. There are only a few times in my life that someone has held my hand so firmly. I began to feel her strength entering my body. I looked at the audience and was overwhelmed by the compassion in their eyes. Between Oprah holding my hand and the loving compassion from the audience, something began to shift inside me. I started to feel my strength returning. It was as if someone suddenly gave me permission to feel my pain, to be weak. I had to accept that I wouldn’t be a "giver" at that moment, that I might look pathetic because once I started crying, I knew I wouldn’t be able to stop, and I wouldn't be able to speak clearly (especially terrifying with English being my third language). Yet, simultaneously, I started feeling a new strength within me. The compassion from Oprah and the audience lifted me up.
Suddenly, my mental canvas appeared before me. I saw little drops of compassionate tears falling on the little flower, and it slowly started lifting itself up. As my own tears rolled down my face—tears that were compassionate toward me and for all the other single mothers and children of abusive parents—and as I felt immense gratitude for Oprah and all the women there, the words kept flowing in my head. Later, I grabbed a pen and started writing: "With every compassionate tear falling down, a little flower grows..." I also heard beautiful music in my head. Eventually, I combined the words from my journal and the music, and you can hear it below.
REflection prompts
1. Personal Resilience:
• Reflect on a time when you felt overwhelmed by pain or fear. How did you cope with those feelings? What helped you find your strength again?
2. Compassion and Support:
• Think about a moment when someone unexpectedly supported you during a difficult time. How did their support affect you? How did it change your perspective or emotions?
3. Emotional Expression:
• Consider the role of emotional expression in your life. How do you usually handle your emotions? Do you tend to suppress them or express them openly?
4. Vulnerability and Strength:
• Reflect on the connection between vulnerability and strength. How has being vulnerable allowed you to grow or become stronger in your own life?
5. Impact on Others:
• Think about how your actions and words affect those around you. How can you be more mindful of offering compassion and support to others?
Reflection Prompts specific for the Poem:
1. The Flower Metaphor:
• Reflect on the metaphor of flowers in the poem. What does the image of a flower represent for you in terms of emotional well-being and personal growth?
2. Compassionate Tears:
• Think about the times you have shed compassionate tears, either for yourself or others. How did these moments of compassion impact you or those around you?
3. Positive and Negative Influences:
• Consider the positive and negative influences in your life. How have acts of kindness and support helped you grow? Conversely, how have unkind words or neglect affected you?
4. Gardening Your Inner World:
• Reflect on the idea of being the gardener of your own life. How do you nurture your inner world? What actions can you take to ensure your 'flowers' grow and thrive?
5. Role of Community:
• Think about the role of community and collective compassion. How has the support of a group or community helped you in your personal journey? How can you contribute to a supportive environment for others?
• Reflect on a time when you felt overwhelmed by pain or fear. How did you cope with those feelings? What helped you find your strength again?
2. Compassion and Support:
• Think about a moment when someone unexpectedly supported you during a difficult time. How did their support affect you? How did it change your perspective or emotions?
3. Emotional Expression:
• Consider the role of emotional expression in your life. How do you usually handle your emotions? Do you tend to suppress them or express them openly?
4. Vulnerability and Strength:
• Reflect on the connection between vulnerability and strength. How has being vulnerable allowed you to grow or become stronger in your own life?
5. Impact on Others:
• Think about how your actions and words affect those around you. How can you be more mindful of offering compassion and support to others?
Reflection Prompts specific for the Poem:
1. The Flower Metaphor:
• Reflect on the metaphor of flowers in the poem. What does the image of a flower represent for you in terms of emotional well-being and personal growth?
2. Compassionate Tears:
• Think about the times you have shed compassionate tears, either for yourself or others. How did these moments of compassion impact you or those around you?
3. Positive and Negative Influences:
• Consider the positive and negative influences in your life. How have acts of kindness and support helped you grow? Conversely, how have unkind words or neglect affected you?
4. Gardening Your Inner World:
• Reflect on the idea of being the gardener of your own life. How do you nurture your inner world? What actions can you take to ensure your 'flowers' grow and thrive?
5. Role of Community:
• Think about the role of community and collective compassion. How has the support of a group or community helped you in your personal journey? How can you contribute to a supportive environment for others?
Below is a regular format of this poem about compassion:
WITH EVERY COMPASSIONATE TEAR
With every compassionate tear fallen down,
a little flower grows.
With every tear that’s been kept inside,
a little flower falls.
With every smile on someone’s face,
a little flower lives.
With every word unkindly spoken,
a flower loses a leaf.
With every gift and sign of support,
a flower wants to rise.
With lack of love or faith in one,
a flower surely dies.
As you’re the gardener on this Earth
and you reap what you sow,
remember on your path of life:
flowers were meant to grow.
With every compassionate tear fallen down,
a little flower grows.
With every tear that’s been kept inside,
a little flower falls.
With every smile on someone’s face,
a little flower lives.
With every word unkindly spoken,
a flower loses a leaf.
With every gift and sign of support,
a flower wants to rise.
With lack of love or faith in one,
a flower surely dies.
As you’re the gardener on this Earth
and you reap what you sow,
remember on your path of life:
flowers were meant to grow.
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